“It’s the ‘fake life’, she began.  “That’s what I call it now.  Don’t you think that’s a good book title?  I know it sounds a little down and maybe too simple. But don't you think?  It’s the ‘friend’ who calls to talk to you for five minutes, but there’s no conversation.  They tell you all about their lives, and it’s usually about one problem in particular.  Something won’t start or turn off; maybe it’s a mental condition or it's the kid, the car.  Menstuation. They make a few observations and that's the conversation.  There is no conversation.  And it all began on such a high note.  You were so happy to hear from this person but then just as suddenly the joy disappears and you’re thinking, why am I even friends with this person?  And the answer is because you don’t have a lot of friends and everyone is telling you to stay in step, stay tuned, stay up, get the latest gadget to stay in touch.  “Otherwise, we worry about you.” So you fake it up. All I really want to do is say, “I love you” and hang up before I can be disappointed.  Just take that one true thing, throw it out there, and leave it…. Here’s the worst, though.  I have these friends, and they’re well meaning.  They’ll call me and say, so Cassandra, how are you and we haven’t heard from you in a while and we just hope you’re getting out.  And you think to yourself, ‘you hope I’m getting out?’ That’s the last thing I want. Going out is just like the phone.  You’re so excited at the thought and then by the time you walk in the front door you just want to keep right on going, through the foyer, the den, the living room, the kitchen, the guest bedroom, and out the back door and back to your car.  So what I do is this:  I lie. I say, ‘I went to the most fabulous party the other night. I don’t know why you weren’t there.’  And they’re caught off guard and you make up some scripty thing about the agent you met or the cute guy who swept you away and actually did all the things he whispered he would do, and isn’t that unusual, because usually men these days always never do all the things they need to do for long enough and then they’re back to sleep in a flash and you can’t even wake them up to send them home.  But see I don’t have that problem anymore. Yes, I am withdrawing from sex, but at the same time I’m longing for romance, and then sometimes I’ll get in heat but then that diminishes and it’s just the thought of romance that’s enough. That’s what I realize. I’m happy with just the thought…. But here’s what happened this morning. I was going out for a walk, as I do every morning, I go out to the university, and there was this woman standing in the street weeping.  I don’t know what was the matter.  She lives across the street. I don’t think she's Hispanic; maybe Portuguese, but I just went up to her and hugged her and we just stood there for about 10 minutes in the middle of the street.  Incredible.  I felt so good later and it just stays with you for the whole day.”  There was the sound of ringing in the background. ” Okay, my friend, I love you.  Gotta go……